In today’s society, the concept of adultery seems pretty cut and dried. It is generally defined as engaging in sexual behavior outside of one’s marriage. The majority of Americans also include romantic overtures that do not culminate in sex—the so-called “emotional affair.” Yet adultery has been defined in many ways throughout history. Many, though not… Read more »
Dr. Helen Fisher leads and analyzes the Singles in America Studies carried out by Match.com for the past 7 years. Each year, five thousand participants who are not Match clients answer questions that Helen and others at Match choose. The Match group had specific questions in mind this year, like how are Millenials different from others… Read more »
Watch the movie Pride and Prejudice to learn about slow love and how it can happen. Learn how a first-date impression can be so wrong. Someone you dislike can turn out to be that special person you marry. What makes the people in the relationships in this movie compatible? Pride and Prejudice 2005 Starring Keira Knightley, Matthew Macfadyen,… Read more »
Have you ever met someone to whom you felt immediately drawn? Chances are, without even realizing it was happening, you slipped into an unconscious, new yet oddly familiar social dance with that person. Although every couple and every situation is different, science shows that we all follow the same basic patterns when showing and receiving… Read more »
Flirting is a complex but highly necessary social ritual. Without flirting, prospective mates would find it difficult or impossible to build the framework necessary for a long-lasting and loving relationship. Many people claim not to know how to flirt, but research shows that flirting is actually a deeply ingrained and instinctive pattern of behavior. Here… Read more »
Assuming that the initial courtship ritual is successful, potential lovers will likely move on to the next step, the dinner date. Food has been a major element in romance since the dawn of human existence. At one time, men needed to demonstrate that they were avid hunters and providers in order to attract a mate…. Read more »
Means-goals relations analysis is a method of looking at relationships based on how well the partners help each other to achieve their life goals. Each person is the means to the other’s goals. Relationships are analyzed according to goals theory, which basically states that: • means are assessed according to their instrumentality in reaching goals… Read more »
Romance plays out in innumerable different ways. There is no “right” way to fall in love or to proceed with a relationship. Some people have many different partners. Some marriages are arranged. Some people are workaholics who find love an inconvenience or distraction, and some prioritize finding love above all other parts of life. Regardless… Read more »
Your choice of romantic partner might seem mind-boggling to your friends, and could even catch you by surprise. After all, as the old saying goes, “the heart wants what the heart wants.” However, it turns out that what the heart wants tends to follow what is known as your love map. This is an unconscious… Read more »
Romantic love is as ancient as time itself, and it has long been considered the province of philosophers and poets. After all, it causes waves of euphoria and torment that seem to come crashing down at the slightest provocation, defying all reason or logic. It tends to manifest just at the moment we aren’t looking… Read more »
Helen Fisher’s Ted Summit talk “Technology Hasn’t Changed Love. Here’s Why.” (recorded June 2016 in Banff, Canada) discusses how, even though we have developed new ways to court each other using technology, the fundamental priciples of love remain the same. Helen discusses how our faster connections actually lead us to a new form of courtship… Read more »
Means-goals relations, supporting each other’s goals, is a way of analyzing relationships based on how much each partner helps the other to achieve his or her goals. In this case, the partners are each other’s means to reaching their individual goals. Mutual perceived instrumentality, or a relationship in which each partner is instrumental in helping… Read more »
Forgiving is never easy, and forgetting is even harder. Yet a lack of forgiveness can torpedo a relationship, drain your energy, and increase your tendency to build unhealthy emotional walls around yourself. True forgiveness soothes the mind and soul, builds bridges, and helps you move forward in an emotionally healthy way. Many people have a… Read more »
Regret is one of the most powerful human emotions. It is difficult to forget and tough to overcome. Yet when left unchecked, regret can become paralyzing. It can lock you up inside your own mind, weighing you down with fear, anger, and sadness. Despite the challenges, then, it is crucial to find ways to deal… Read more »
During the heady early days of a relationship, it is incredibly easy to mistake passion for lasting love. You might feel as if the whole world revolves around your partner, stare longingly into the distance when he is away, and feel butterflies in your stomach before each date. Yet, while passion is an important element… Read more »
They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Yet this is not entirely true. While every person certainly has his or her own preferences regarding physical type, dress, and other external factors, some people simply present a magnetism that cuts across individual preferences and allows them to charm everyone in the room…. Read more »
While some people are fiercely dedicated to the single life, human nature and evolutionary biology mean that the vast majority of people crave an intimate relationship. Yet sustaining those relationships is not easy. Roughly 40 percent of first marriages fail, while subsequent marriages are even less likely to succeed. The reasons are as varied as… Read more »
Every person and every relationship is an individual, and what is a deal breaker for you might be a must-have quality for someone else. It is important to make your own list of ideal qualities for a potential mate to possess, and to identify which ones are absolutely essential to you. However, no matter who… Read more »
Love is tough to narrow down. Poets write about it, philosophers discuss it, musicians sing about it, and most humans crave it, but actually defining love is complex. Once you have it, you will know it, but holding onto it is not always easy. Fortunately, science can help us define love, find it, and even… Read more »
Love and attraction are arguably the most confusing of all human emotions. Poets write about them, philosophers ponder them, and virtually all humans actively seek them. Self-help guides and magazines are filled with tips, tricks, and suggestions to help you find the right mate, but the advice can be conflicting. Love and attraction have been… Read more »
Because “the development of a close relationship is sustained, escalating, reciprocal, personal self-disclosure” researchers tried this series of 36 questions to induce romantic feelings. They were partially successful. It turns out that many people have used the questions to increase closeness in a current relationship. They had fun doing it. You might like to try it. The… Read more »
History is filled with examples of lovers who claim to have fallen in love at first sight. It might even have happened to you—seeing a mysterious, magnetic stranger across the room, you feel irresistibly drawn to that person. You might even be compelled to start a conversation that lasts all night. By morning, you are… Read more »
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In today’s society, the concept of adultery seems pretty cut and dried. It is generally defined as engaging in sexual behavior outside of one’s marriage. The majority of Americans also include romantic overtures that do not culminate in sex—the so-called “emotional affair.” Yet adultery has been defined in many ways throughout history. Many, though not… Read more »
